A Sea For Yourself
There’s a back beach near home that never seems to get quite right. Whatever factors of geology and geometry need to align to meld together sand movement, swell directions, and wind protection to form a nice beach break, it’s missing a few.
While it should serve as springtime haven from the northerlies, its beach is separated from the adjacent headland by a fifty-odd metre stretch of low, craggy sandstone rock beds and a small rocky lagoon which makes it susceptible to the 9 o’clock nor'east chop. The sand formations offer almost exclusively two variations: straight outer banks which drop off into a gutter, or a deep hole that detonates into an unfriendly and shapeless shorebreak.
It’s just kind of there, the kind of place you only check as a last resort when you’re absolutely desperate for a paddle.
Then, one day, it was good. Like really good. An every-dog-has-its-day kinda day. As good-as-it’s-gunna-get kinda good. And I had it all to myself.
Now, surfing alone on a Northern NSW back beach isn’t the dreamy scenario it once was, thanks to the increased presence of the Great White Biteys over the last decade. There’s plenty of checking your 6 and hard staring at random ocean swirls and sea floor shadows. On this day, familiarity and the lack of any fatal attack scenarios so far this year at least allowed the opportunity to be aware, but not alarmed.
Still, surfing alone in good conditions is the absolute apogee of the surf experience, is it not?
So, it was with an elevated sense of loathing that I watched two wetsuited figures as they dared amble up the beach towards my peak.
Yer, my peak, I was here first. I’d planted my metaphorical flag, declared Terra Nullius on this twenty-odd metre odd strip of oceanic estate.
I knew what was going to happen next. We’ve all been here, on both sides of the scenario. They’d paddle out to where I was sitting which was clearly the best peak on the beach. Depending on personality type, there’d be an exchange of pleasantries - “How’s it going? Looks fun! Been out long?” - before they'd begin taking waves, or they’d simply use their superior numbers to freeze me out and aggressively colonise the peak, resigning me to the position of fringe-dweller, picking up the scraps as they pillaged their newly-won wealth.
I turned back to the horizon and waited, a jubilant mood already turning sour as I tryed to ignore their imminent arrival, to ignore the looming transition that occurs as soon as there's another surfer in the lineup. The tactical moves, the social games that we all play when we compete with others for the finite resource of the best waves.
But they never arrived.
Instead, I heard some quiet chatter from two peaks over. Chancing a glancing look, I spy two twin towers of salty grey hair sitting stoically on their boards. Despite their seemingly advancing age, their Flash Bomb wetsuits and well worn shortboards with modern curves, marked the duo as competent and knowledgeable riders, confirmed later after watching them from afar navigate a few tricky take offs. One offers a distant friendly wave and a nod.
For the next half an hour or so we observe an unspoken gentleman's agreement to sit away from each other. They're happy to surf a slightly inferior peak to allow us all to get waves with minimal fuss and make the most of the conditions. No pissing contests, no hassling, no unwanted competition, just the chance to enjoy good waves and savour the experience. Old school principles all but seemingly forgotten in much of the modern surfing experience.
Strolling up the beach after I'd had my fill, the sky mirrored the ocean in radiant blue as the unexpected all day spring offshore kept on keeping on. Split peaks kept on splitting. I watch my two distant companions paddle their way over towards the now vacant peak to get their share.
Whoever you are out there, I say thanks for your patience, and I hope you scored.
// DAN DOBBIN
(Photos Craig Brokensha)
Comments
Summed it up perfectly Dan.
Beautiful. The seemingly long forgotten first rule of surf etiquette.
Need some waterproof stickers with a QR code that sends them to such rules... slap people with them that don't behave, sticker on cheek, "Scan that ya farkwit, now fark orf!"
Great expression of some of the subtlties Dan.
What's most dissappointing is when people paddle on up and start breaking all the etiquette without even knowing what it is.
A couple of times I've felt like a really grumpy old man having to have words with younger groms who have just gotten too proficient to try and pull the shit they used to be able to get away with. I try to do it in very calm tones but they're not always happy about it. Back in my day I think to myself...
Just a few days ago i was almost amazed when a young surfer came to sit next to me where i was waiting for some wide ones. He quietly sat just outside of me without trying to negotiate his way to the inside. Needless to say I was very friendly, it's so uncommon these days regardless of ability.
What's the actual problem with him paddling inside of you though if he's going for a different kind of wave?
I got called out a few years ago for doing this, but the old guys were basically sitting in the channel waiting for bigger waves that never came. I wanted the smaller punchy ones breaking on the inside. There was no overlap and we all could have happily had our fill without the need for any words.
Hey Peabo, I've got no problem with it if people say that's what they're going to do, or if I know them and they're respectful. It's when people paddle inside with no communication sit right next to you or just a tiny bit further out. We all know we are going to be competing for the same waves.
If they do that I'll often paddle just inside of them and sit right next to them on the inside. They usually get the concept then but I'd rather just talk about it. I surf a lot of crowded breaks and things can be fine when people are behaving or rubbish when they're not.
I reckon you wouldn't have been called out if you had explained your plan and then followed through.
Most of us have been burned too many times to let it slide otherwise. It's really easy to say something and way more respectful.
In the case I mentioned the young guy wanted the same waves I did, he was just prepared to wait his turn, super refreshing.
If you don't cut the head off the snakes (or drop ins) or entitled surfers they just become emboldened and establish a culture of bad behaviour. Thus destroying once great surf spots. I love seeing some clown trying to pull this crap on those that are happy to do the right thing. Had many a surf go from pleasant to hostile due to entitled surfers trying to pull this shit. Got no time for it, everybody hates it, but it's only a few who regulate. If you are fucking up another's peaceful surfing experience through entitled behaviour you deserve to get owned. Be it called out or fucked up, plenty of crew do the right thing but it's the entitled fuckwits that fuck it for all. I don't care how good you surf or who you hang with. Your just making a cunt of yourself at another's expense. Fuck off, the me, me, me attitude needs to be erased and plenty will do it wether vocally or forcibly. People can cry foul but if you instigate shitty behaviour in the line ups I hope you get owned every time. Your fun doesn't come at the exclusion of others no matter what you want or what you've been told. People will never respect this shitty approach to surfing through learnt entitlement fuck off. Using the excuse of I JUST want the ones your not taking is bullshit, how do you know what I want? Especially if your taking everything through hassling and fucking a functioning lineup. It's called etiquette for a reason. Some have it some do not. Basic respect. Pro teams in indo are notorious for this behaviour, seven to a boat and an attitude to match. fuck off.
Quote
Depending on personality type, there’d be an exchange of pleasantries - “How’s it going? Looks fun! Been out long?” - before they'd begin taking waves, or they’d simply use their superior numbers to freeze me out and aggressively colonise the peak, resigning me to the position of fringe-dweller, picking up the scraps as they pillaged their newly-won wealth.
Epic little story Dan. Everyone's a winner. Love it.
A rarity in this day and age.
I can relate to that seething feeling though, to me everyone is an arsehole until they prove otherwise.
A simple story, not often told, that is a big part of surfing.
Good surf manners matter.
yep remember having a scorcher all to myself when out come two cock heads to spoil my party.....chief cockhead paddles straight to the inside yelling out 'honey moons over mate'....and he was right ...lucky i had my fill .......
Wow
Absolute flog!
Noice!
I can't count the times I've had a bank, or whole beach to myself, and sure enough, out they come. To me! Not the next bank,or the one after that. To me. You fucking kidding! Then they have to say something. I can feel them watching me, waiting for the opportunity of eye contact and the inevitable 'nice waves huh' blah blah blah. 'Fuck off cunt'...'yeah, nice waves'. It's like they're waiting in the bushes. Too scared to paddle out on their own, maybe. It was empty for a few hours before I got here. Why fucken now? Then another and another! FUCKEN SERIOUS? Most are kooks which then proceed to blow just about every wave you HAVE to give them. At least rip it to the beach.Or stand up. Don't pull back. Don't waste it. So bad since covid. Some get the hint after a while of cold shoulder, and paddle away. But not many. I've never vented my frustration at anyone for obvious reasons. But FUCK! If you need company, pull up a chair at someone's table at a coffee shop and start chatting. I've been surfing for over 40 years. Nothing changed, just many more of them. I'm rambling. See you out there.
Often works to outpaddle ‘’em way too deep inside between sets then when they eventually paddle inside, charge back over to the actual takeoff laughing while they get cleaned up. Sheep! Doesn’t work for long though.
Could call that move ...sheperd & the sheep.
Bank Robbers - should be put in jail.
Back in the day.... We'd rock up to the cliff edge on Victoria's ship wreck coast, after a long walk from a make shift car park, and check the surf. If it has more than 3 blokes on a bank, we'd move on, or scan another option. Now days, sh!t, what can you say, but "hi", and hope they are less kook than those at your local spot. Times they are a changing.
Absolutely nailed it Dan!
This is one of those unwritten rules of etiquette. There's the odd occasion in remote places where an extra head is welcomed, but along the East Coast with beachies popping off everywhere, paddling out to a seperate peak will be openly welcomed.
I had the opposite scenario a couple of months ago.
I spotted an insanely perfect, pumping righthand bank firing off down a beach on a quiet bit of coast. It's known for it's sharks and the water was brown from flood waters.
No way was I not going to paddle out but some company would help.
I ran into a couple of other guys scoping the beach, they hadn't identified the right so I pointed it out as a set cornered in perfectly, semi-hollow and running off for 75m or so. I said there's a right out there, I'm going to hit it, my way of inviting them to increase the numbers.
They turned their nose at it.. "aghh that's the first one that's broke there, been watching for ages, it's a unicorn."
So there I was paddling out to something like in the Search movies, not a soul around, a little nervous but hooting at the perfection. I had it for two hours to myself before one other finally came to join me.
I love a solo surf, but in situations like above, some extra company is sometimes warranted.
Said session is pictured above.
epic Craig. Cracking pic too
So the best break on the beach was firing...the best it's ever been and the idea of sharing the stoke was lost in a sea of self entitledness?
I love sharing waves...and 3 sharing a wave is not having anyone miss out.
This story could be about 1 person turning up to a wave with 1 other already out...paddle out and the reception was frosty, the look of horror and anger was visible, the idea of sharing was never there...the shared surf brotherhood of being stoked when others score was something read on SN
....and then the posts would be about how shitty others are in not sharing waves.
You have more faith in your fellow man than I do.
That feeling of apprehension when spotting new arrivals in an uncrowded line up is real for many of us.
Had too many quiet surfs ruined by one or two arrogant arseholes or muppets with no idea.
Personally, I don't stink eye anyone for just paddling out , it's what they do after that may warrant the icy glare and the cold shoulder.
I'm more than happy to share any line-up with people who use the basic common courtesies.
My two cents...those two guys did the right thing as there were other options down the beach. But what if there is not? I would suggest it's ok to paddle out, but why wouldn't you say to the lone surfer "You were here first, take whatever wave you want and we'll have a crack at the rest". No one "owns" any piece of the ocean but you can still have good manners.
Yep, great way to approach it.
The wrong way is to paddle out and then try and hassle for the first set wave that comes that old mate has been waiting peacefully for. With that attitude I'd quickly let them know the etiquette.
100% Cookie1
Last weekend, wasn't epic but very good, 5 guys in the water (all strangers), left peak about 3-4ft, very ripable. A bit of a walk but a popular spot. Guys having a chat between sets, we all knew who's turn it was and amazingly, it stayed like that the whole session!
Nothing better !
Down in SW - W.A I'm crossing my fingers there is at least one person out, especially at first light.
Or if I'm out by myself I'm hoping one or two other crew paddle out haha
A couple of months ago I had a loving couple on mals come out and sit 10m further out to sea than me strategically 45 degrees either side. He got the next left, she got the next right…then they went and sat in opposite block out positions. Bet they were good at chess.
Yes we had an empty beach…luckily they moved peaks…
Thanks Dan, nicely told. Extra points for use of 'apogee'
"hard staring at random ocean swirls and sea floor shadows." - haha well put, I've done plenty of that when out by myself ;-)
I'll sometimes paddle out where there are other people. Not because of the waves, but because I wanna lower the odds in case of any bitey boys.
My standard strategy after getting a good one is to paddle back away from the peak as sure as shit all the sheeples will have paddled over....sure you may get a couple of average waves thereafter but if they are dumb enough, and often they are, they will follow you back over. And the cycle continues. That is of course you if have plenty of time, but if you're in a hurry to get your fill it all goes out the door. Those guys were proper surfers Dan, even if they had nowhere else to go it would have worked out. But yeah, good waves on your pat malone is indeed the "apogee". Nice word that, I'm gonna use it.
Rocked up for an arvo session yesterday, walked a couple of hundred metres down the beach for a quiet one. No one out at the 4 or so peaks I passed on the way. Within 15 mins 1 bloke does the walk and joins me. Goes to drop in on the first wave through once he’s out. Lovely. Within 10 more another 5. I caught one in, disgusted.
Serious!! That makes me so angry and I wasn't even there.
My partner and I were enjoying a glassy evening wave in summer a couple of years back... we were literally the only two people in the water on the entire stretch of kms of beach... laughing, being our usual ridiculous selves... it was two foot on the sets... plenty of peaky waves up and down... it was amazing...
then...
in the car park...
we see a figure, a board, a paddle
uggghhhhh
surely this dude won't come out on our little peak... surely not
well - as he runs down the dune we see him fixated on us...
yup... here he comes
Captain Sup - full speed ahead - directly at us
you've got to be fuckn joking right??
He actually paddles between us, splashing me in the face and hitting my partner with a follow through with his paddle in an attempt to get the very first lump that came through...
He missed it... We just sat on our boards while Captain Sup flapped around and decided he was going the very next lump... missed it..
My partner then turns and goes on one that's actually going to break and peel of gently - a left...
Captain Flapper decides he's going too - but right... and right into my fella, who luckily has enough skill from surfing the best part of 5 decades, avoided major damage although a collision wasn't entirely avoidable..
Words were exchanged, boards checked for dings, loud eye rolls from us, reset...
Next set - Captain Flapper goes again - right... on a left... straight at my fella again...
No words but Captain Flapper got the picture..
I tried a different method.
I dropped my one piece down to my waist - exposing my ample boobs - and talking loudly about sexy shit and how amazing the evening was and how divine the colours of the sky were and the silvers and greys and the amazingness of surfing by ourselves..
Old mate didn't actually know what to do...
He definitely moved away..
Not like fuck off dickhead far away - but we managed to kind of get our peace back..
I usually get cranky and have words - but that evening boobs seemed to work...
This coast is unfortunately proper fucked now thanks to covid surfers, zero etiquette and absolute entitlement.. it's past the point of no return..
I find I drive 3 hours now to get the ultimate joy of a solo surf... well worth the effort to avoid the Death Star overcrowded shite that is now full time on this coast..
More tits out I say..
Ha!
What is wrong with people.
People like that are in it for the wrong reasons it seems. Just need to be seen so go to the only group of surfers on an uncrowded beach and make a menace of themselves.
Nice write up Dan. I know exactly where you are talking about and you have some pretty big gonads to surf that stretch by yourself!