Submitted by Shatner'sBassoon on Fri, 11/06/2015 - 19:48
AN ALL-ENCOMPASSING KALEIDOSCOPIC JOIN-THE-DOTS/ADULT COLOURING BOOK EXPERIMENTAL PROJECT IN NARCISSISTIC/ONANISTIC BIG PICTURE PARASITIC FORUM BLEEDING.
LIKE POLITICAL LIFE, PARTICIPATION IS WELCOME, ENCOURAGED EVEN, BUT NOT NECESSARY.
Ahh Blowin you shoulda left the original
besides you redeemed yourself with the second one.
Despite my best efforts , I’ll never be the fuckwit I aspire to be.
Doesn’t mean I shouldn’t keep striving.
At least you spelt 'fuckwit' right.
You Am I was s'posed to be playing here tomorrow night. Doing a tribute to Spinal Tap. Canned it at the last minute. Bugger.
Now there is a topic a whole new forum, what a utter total pretentious wanker tim rodgers is. grade a fuckwit wannabe ,try hard b grade rockstar
If he is B grade who's A grade? Farnsey and Barnsey?
Perfect for Spinal Tap then, hey Mikey?
The David St Hubbins of Oz rawk.
Who is your A grade? Richard Clapton? I like Capricorn Dancer but it's a wee bit old.
Is there an Oz A grade in the mainstream-ish sense now-ish?
Now I gotta go to some blues fest with old pricks playing cod blues.
No surf anyways.
Going back to those Jaws writeups
A body of a diver is washed up in a quiet coastal holiday town. Initially it's thought he was run over by a speed boat. The town gets the state's foremost marine scientist to examine the body. "Speedboat".
A surfer is attacked by a massive shark, and his body is not found. The town recoils in horror. The biologist reminds everyone that sharks are now protected. The mayor organises a festival on behalf of sharks, with nice performances like fire twirlers. It gets over 15,000 likes. The local green candidate demands, and achieves, removal of all shark nets, while everyone forgets the guy lobbying to protect the pink snapper.
Four swimmers are ripped apart by at least two sharks in a 48 hour period. Schools cancel their water activities. The town forces the mayor to act, and the shark nets are about to be reinstalled. The state government overrules the local shire, and they remain uninstalled as this conforms to their new Marine Park policy.
Holiday season arrives. Numbers are down and people are anxious to enter the water. A crusty old shark fisherman attends a town meeting to explain how to catch the sharks, and is hounded out of the meeting.
Two kayakers are attacked by a large shark. Only one makes it back to shore. She is petrified and says the shark is as large as a whale.
A shark breaches and takes out the Westpac helicopter, none of the crew survive.
The mayor devises a cunning plan to placate the shark. Local cattle will be sacrificed to it, in the river, just across from the floating restaurant. The parks and wildlife officers feeding the sharks are frightened beyond belief at the size of the multiple sharks eating the cattle whole.
A crisis meeting is called, an extravagant buffet at the floating restaurant. Half way into the meeting four enormous sharks breach and sink the restaurant and eat the mayor, all the local candidates, the scientist, all guests, half the kitchen and wait staff and the poor pink snapper lobbyist.
The state government declares a crisis, and decides to evacuate the town, and bulldoze and bury all its buildings like they did with Wittenoom. The people are moved to Western Sydney and now live in those flammable apartments. The end.
I think you’ve captured the zeitgeist perfectly.
Round of applause.
...... or it could be a hysterical over reaction to the inevitability of a very small number of shark attacks occurring from time to time.
OK, A grade... but... IMHO... FIFO!!!?? Honest!!! Well... hey hey, my my...
OK... it aint no illusion!!!?? Only on the eastern sea board but... trump cards in a nutshell!!! stupe's boyz cookin' up a storm in the kitchen... ad infinitum!!! Ain't no illusion... sharks from cronulla!!! IMHO... honest!!! Lurv shack... bitchin' in the kitchen but!!! Blue army wavin' forever!!! Photers too!!! Bombs away... shutter buttons poppin too but!!! Air time!!! Rackets and brackets ding... batshitfest!!! Its A grade dribble... ton, but!!! Ain't no illusion but... trumpetin'...(not to be confused with tin tin)!!! Rackets, brackets and straight shootin' jackets... jackshit in a nutshell!!!
IMHO... keepin' it real... but... honest!!!
Hey hey, my, my... its Saturday!!! In a nutshell!!!
But, there's real good news. Make your own fuckin' brackets! From the ground up!
Been on holiday mate? You haven't been around lately.
Nah, not till next year.
Klein's a real goer hey blinder. Piece of light at the end of the puzzle.
Doc Tanzi's lot ain't so bad either.
There's real hope for the bracket makers!
I gotta go do another workout... again!
The ban’s been lifted
I was paid a visit by a shark on Friday morning. It scared the shit out of me. After that I went to the shopping centre with my wife. The company was lovely, and we had a nice time together. Apart from that though, it was dead boring. My highlight of the day was the shark. I’m glad they’re there. It makes surfing more primal, and soothes my soul enough to endure suburbia. I had a good look around and can assure you if you want somewhere safe to hang out, my local shopping centre is tops
Good call, Shoredump.
Decent size shark ?
Did it come close ?
It about 3 metres away heading towards me, but just a juvenile. It was more scared than me I think as it did a pretty quick u turn. Enough to make me lift my legs for a while, but not enough to send me in
I can see how people might think Tim Rodgers is a bit of a wanker, he plays the rockstar act to a tee.
I use to know a few guys in the Melb music scene back in the 90's and often go backstage and party on at different places after gigs.
And i remember meting Tim backstage one time and he was the nicest guy you could met, sat down next to me and my mate on these stairs and struck up a conversation that wasn't all about him, opened his bottle of red wine and offered me some, i guess looking back i was just a frothing fan boy grommet hoping to get some free piss, but he didn't just ignore us or have a 30 second conversation and try to get away, actually hung out talked and drank and then invited us to the pub they were going to too shot some pool and party on.
You am I are amazing.
They lost me after Hourly daily, but still love the EP's and first three albums, hadn't listened them for ages but dusted of Sound as ever and Hi Fi way the other day to play in the car, was a little disappointed at how Hi fi way has aged didn't sound as good as i remembered, but Sound as Ever still sounds really fresh and powerful, just has this really clean but fuzzy warm and powerful sound.
Anyone go to the Tumbleweed gigs where You Am I were support? It was like that for a while I think. They were great gigs
I saw You Am I play what I think was the toughest gig ever ....... opening for the Beasts of Bourbon and Iggy Pop and they were great, got the vibe happening nicely. These days Tim Rogers would be about the hardest working man in the business. He is always gigging in one form or another. You Am I play Taronga Zoo with Magic Dirt in February!
Yeah a very long time ago, i think it was my first real gig.
launceston Uni in Tassie, headliners were Tumbleweed, then You Am I that only had EP's out at the time and they were actually quite heavy live, and then Tassie lads Fridge in front of their local crowd, would have been mid 93.
Just googled it, yep May-June 93 "tune in tune out tour"
Blindboy & Blowin my little shark story is exactly what both of you describe! :)
The ending was done that way in honour of 'Night of the Living Dead' where they (spoiler alert) nuke the whole town, sending the dead-raising chemical up into the sky which then begins to rain. I wanted to evoke that level of stupidity.
I liked it VJ.
I saw You am I at Port Hedland in the early 2000s on a stinking hot night. They were giving it their all and sweating furiously. All night people were yelling out encouragement and compliments but the only call they acknowledged was when someone shouted out “ Nice work , gentlemen.”
Then the lead guitarist and Tim Rodgers both thanked the guy for his comment. It dawned on me that they appreciated the idea that they were in this hardcore working town and THEY were working their arses off for the crowd. They didn’t give a fuck about the celebrity endorsements of the wolf whistles which they’d probably heard a million times before , but to be recognised for their work ethic and giving hard working people what they paid to see and being seen as kindred spirits was the respect they craved.
But then again , I was absolutely banana’d , so I may have misread the whole thing.
IMHO the best thing You Am I have done is their Play School gig.
How come no one peddles their deragotory “ Anzacery “ bullshit on Remembrance Day , pillorying those who would spare some time to appreciate the toll payed by those in our name , when it’s nothing more or less than international recognition of the exact same occasion that Anzac Day is domestically ?
Are there people on the world stage saying that the soldiers were rapists like an emboldened Scott Mccintyre felt was appropriate to declare on Anzac Day ?
Remembrance Day is usually celebrated with quiet dignity. ANZAC day has become a celebration of drinking, gambling and obnoxious draped in the flag bullshit patriotism.
Anzac Day is celebrated in 24000000 different ways. If some like to attend the dawn service and share a beer with some diggers or to merely have a drink in remembrance as is Australian custom , who are you to say what’s appropriate or acceptable ?
The days are an exact same recognition of the exact same thing. It’s just that the Australian cultural cringe isn’t freely on display when the entire Western Hemisphere is involved. They save their self hatred for more private occasions !
And that’s all it’s ever been ....cultural cringe and self hatred disguised as moral superiority. Actually it goes further than that ....where did this neo cultural cringe originate ?
I’ve got an idea , but unfortunately not the inclination to delve into it right now. Sunday arvo , friends due , corks to be popped etc etc
Another time. You just know that the Anzac Day Swellnet opinion grudge match is inked onto the calendar .
Ready and waiting Blowin.
Oops , nearly forgot...What do those who oppose nationalism think about Macron’s plan for an EU army ?
Poor bastards won’t know what to think. First they’re told that they shouldn’t like nations ‘cause nation’s are bad ( for business ) and they cause wars OK , now they’re told that a collective of nations brought together under the auspices of peace ( cough cough , business again ) ....are getting an army !
What a surprise. Not.
PS . Loving Macron saying that the EU army may protect them against the USA. The very same USA who literally saved their entire nation twice in the last hundred years. Macron decries division and then discards a centuries old alliance for personal political opportunism.
Macron is a true piece of shit.
2018 is indeed an anniversary - of the start in 1618 of the 30 Years War. I found an excellent link describing its destruction, well worth a read:
Sounds far more chaotic than today's world tbh.
VJ, what's up with that grubby Return of Kings link?
VJ le provocateur?
I found links to the French author's claims there, and on Sun and Daily Mail - and the ROK description of what he had to say was most in depth. Topic is a response to Blowin's claim of Macron/French/EU army, pointing out they may have other plans drawn up. I also read a very good one on the US army developing strategies to win in very large urban areas, can't find link at present. From this can be gathered military planners are preparing for urban/ethno/religious conflicts.
Certainly the strategies exist, but I gather you think that the French military taking back parts of France is a real possibility for the future?
Blow In, you failed with your first mangled sentence.
"How come no one peddles their deragotory “ Anzacery “ bullshit on Remembrance Day , pillorying those who would spare some time to appreciate the toll payed by those in our name , when it’s nothing more or less than international recognition of the exact same occasion that Anzac Day is domestically ?"
You don't even know what "Anzacery" refers to, do you? Let alone what terms like "legislated nostalgia" or "celebratory jingoism" mean in this context, etc etc etc.
Like your take on "nationalism", you don't really get it. Worse. You don't want to get it.
YOU. DON'T. READ.
No flies on Blowie!
I happened to be at a Remembrance Day ceremony on Sunday. It started with a recording of 'And the Band Played Waltzing Matilda', and finished with someone reciting this:
Dulce et Decorum Est BY WILFRED OWEN
Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs,
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots,
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of gas-shells dropping softly behind.
Gas! GAS! Quick, boys!—An ecstasy of fumbling
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound’ring like a man in fire or lime.—
Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.
In all my dreams before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.
If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil’s sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,—
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.
Latin phrase is from the Roman poet Horace: “It is sweet and fitting to die for one’s country.”
A couple of someone else's thoughts:
Anzackery is sentiment and nostalgia – and it is nationalism, which some people think is patriotism but is really jingoism.
[Blowin - jingoism is extreme patriotism, especially in the form of aggressive or warlike foreign policy.]
Anzac commemoration had drifted away from “quiet remembrance” into something noisier, much more boastful, more self-indulgent, more narcissistic. People now seem to believe that in looking at the Anzacs they are looking at themselves. They aren’t. The dead deserve more respect than to be used to make ourselves feel larger.
Wallowing in sentiment – pickling ourselves in Anzackery – makes it more likely that we will do it all again next time. Only fools glorify war; Australians tend to normalise it.
My words: Anzackery is part of a conscious political campaign by the neo-libs to normalise war and, by focusing on the individuals, the brave troops, put the military beyond reproach.
Smart, but very very nasty.
Mention the word digger these days and you can go to jail.
Libs changed the law so only Govt can profit from the diggers.
In the letterbox is your Glossy commemorative fold out Battlefield with 2 up coin tokenz .
Lib MP's tribute poppy seed Anzac Biscuit recipe
Lib MP's Grandma's Sprig of Rosemary Anzac Lamb recipe
Lib MP Postcard...boots 'n' all shoulder to shoulder mudbathed with Trooper Tommy.
Lib MP's Dawn service reciting Diggerz battle plan poem in your fold out War Game
Lib MP photo with a slouch hat upon heart
Lib MP downs a brew from Diggerz Boot
Lib MP awarded Iron Cross for unfolding Oz flag & laying the wreath with school kids.
Lib MP humming recital of the Last Post!
Lib MP's Southern Cross Tattoo ceremony...Ouch!
Dutto deports you if you ask them to back off a bit...Go team Anzackery!
In such discussions its good for balance to consider pre and post Howard periods.
Keating openly questioned the Anzac tradition stemming from Gallipoli pointing to the heroics on the Kokoda as the time Australians under Australian command defended the country and won.
During and since Howard the emphasis was on Gallipoli and Anzac day and anything associated with remembrance has enjoyed the full support of LNP governments and the public purse. Witness the $500 million announcement to expand the memorial in Canberra.
Likewise Australia Day was heavily promoted and supported by Howard. To do otherwise was "unAustralian".
Join the dots and it all comes back to the "battle of ideas" started by Howard and it continues to this day latterly in the funding for university research grants.
As someone cleverly quipped here "Howard the unflushable turd".
I think you guys need to step outside and turn off the TV.
I’ve pretty much spent Anzac Day in a different place every year for years and everywhere I go it’s just people having a public holiday and giving a few moments over to think of those who served in our name.
The stuff you guys are talking about is confected media / political bullshit that has zero impact on anything else. Some people attend the dawn service, some people spend the day with their kids , some people play two up and have a few drinks. They do what they want to do. They don’t do what you , Peter Dutton or Tracey Grimshaw think they should do.
Of course politicians and retailers try to hijack it , as they will attempt to hijack anything that creates an opportunity to connect with the public. Doesn’t mean that they are successful, influential or that the day is defined in any way by their efforts to shill.
If you’re the type that easily confuses broadcast messages with real life then I can see how you would be concerned, but that’s your issue , no one else’s. If you’re the type that thinks they’re the only person that knows how to act appropriately on Anzac Day , then I’m sorry to say, but you are deluded.
The money spent on the war memorial is just another stimulus package in order to prop up a perilous economy with more debt based government spending. In case no one has noticed, infrastructure spending is the only thing keeping the economy ticking over as the chickens from the ridiculous residential construction Ponzi scheme come home to roost.
Memorial renovations are a quick fix that requires minimal lead time so as to get dollars and jobs pumping ASAP. Think pink bats 2.0. The fact that the money spend has a political element is utterly predictable and totally irrelevant to the public treatment of veterans and regard for the armed forces, past and present , as I discussed previously in this post.
And this is why the ALP tried to form a consensus agreement with the Libs over immigration. They knew that the first to fold over political pressure will romp home in an election , despite both being beholden to Big Australia interest groups.
But it’s not a total whitewash for the Big Australia rent seekers , now they’ll just focus their attentions on Adelaide, Darwin , Hobart and Perth . It was their only real option anyway given the obvious limits faced with continuously loading up the Eastern capital cities.
"The money spent on the war memorial is just another stimulus package."
Hey Blowin, according to the Australian War Memorial’s last annual report the world’s five foremost weapons manufacturers by value of sales (Lockheed Martin, Boeing, BAE Systems, Raytheon and Northrop Grumman) and the 11th largest (Thales) are significant Australian War Memorial supporters.
As I said before, all this shit is a conscious campaign to normalise war.
Apparently when it comes to the frontier wars it suddenly becomes "Best We Forget".
Andy, You live on the North coast , right ?
You think that war has been normalised there ?
Exactly. Same goes for the rest of Australia.
Arms companies donate in Australia in order to cosy up to government and that is the appropriate place for them to do it. It’s a form of lobbying. You think an extra wing on a building in Canberra is going to incite a dormant blood lust in young Aussies?
Or in the thousands of foreign tourists that go to the war memorial each year ? I hope not , they’re mostly Chinese . Maybe it’s intended to intimidate them !
I watched The Drum with Jacquie Lambie last night and war was pretty normal to her. She was rambling on about how we had been in the Middle East for so long and we still had to keep fighting because ........ well because we had to win of course. Screw the poor people caught in the middle of a proxy war between the regional and global powers. Normalisation of war? It has been with us since the liberation of Kuwait ....... the original folly!
It was normal because she volunteered for the army.
You think that’s the situation with the vast , vast majority of Australians ?
"You live on the North coast , right ?
You think that war has been normalised there ?"
Broadly speaking in public discussion, yes.
I'm glad we can agree.